Spring Cleaning

Spring's renewal is evident in the Duckpin Press printshop. A weekend spent cleaning has eradicated a winter's worth of dust, clutter, and loneliness. That was good. However, after we cleaned off the ol' type cabinet (above), its top was looking awfully lonely.

In day's of yore, the cabinet top was a popular repository for strip material or forms in progress. Explore the background in this photo as an example of the former, and the righthand side of this photo as the latter.

Compared to these cabinets, ours has an regrettably underutilized top. That needs to change. Currently we have our hellbox, string to tie up forms, and our printers cap. Oh, and our official shop clock and non-duckpin-sized pin. But there's something missing that we can't put our finger on. Do you have a suitable tchotchke that would be at home in the shop? The requirements are minor:

• it's gotta inspire or make us laugh
• it's gotta be able to spend the winter alone under a coat of dust and not get lonely

Any suggestions that fit the bill?

Take My Ink — Please!

When reading up on one of my favorite comedians, I came across this little nugget on Henny Youngman via Wikipedia:

He grew up in New York City, and his career as a comedian began after he had worked for a number of years at a print shop, where he penned and published a large number of “comedy cards”—cards containing one-line gags that were sold at the shop. The comedy cards were discovered by up-and-coming professional comedian Milton Berle, who encouraged Youngman and formed a close working friendship with him.

Makes perfect sense that the "King of One-Liners" would have started his career this way. It ended some 60 years later, fueled by his violin and jokes that make your dad laugh and your kids groan:

• I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

• My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.

• My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

• There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.

• When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say.

• While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.

Hardy Har

Bad joke to tell over turkey dinner:

Two fonts walk into a bar.
The bartender says, "I'm sorry. We don't serve your type."

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. Gobble gobble!

When Captchas Go Wrong

Huh? Did a 3 year old make this? Does your keyboard have these letters?

The Gambler, Through the Years

A couple jobs ago I had a boss who looked like Kenny Rogers. A lot.

You know the look: silvery white hair, complemented by a well-tended beard that looks equal comfortable reflecting the soft hues of stage lighting as it does catching sauce from a pulled-pork sandwich. Combine that with a confident chin tilt and a gaze that says, I'd like to get up in your Lady Stetson and you've got Kenny. So what's an employee whose boss resembles the Gambler to do? Why, submit his image to MenWhoLookLikeKennyRogers.com, of course.

I was giddy when they certified my boss' image as a bona fide Kenny look-alike by posting it on the site. Going back to visit the other day, I was heartened to find that my old boss Kenny...er, I mean Rick...is still pictured on the site (see Denim Kenny here) some seven years later. But a lot has happened in those seven years. Namely, the real Kenny has had some work done. Some horrible, disfiguring, plastic surgery kinda work. So much so, that he doesn't look like Kenny anymore.

This got me to thinking: if I submitted Kenny Rogers' own post-surgery face to MenWhoLookLikeKennyRogers.com, would he even be accepted?